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August 3, 2004

Ask Hey You

BY
ASK HEY YOU

Dear *Hey You*
I'm single, I go out to the bars looking to meet someone but as a lesbian it's really hard to figure out who's single when all the girls travel in packs. It's intimidating just walking up to someone you think it cute. Any other suggestions?
Signed,
Too Shy

Hey Too Shy -
I completely understand where you’re coming from. I’ve actually have encountered the same, as I don’t want to approach someone who’s gf could be standing right next to her. It’s interesting that you ask this because I have just recently been impressed on an approach that I’ve just witnessed. This was used on one of my friends as we stood around together in the “red room” on the evening of Pride. She came up to her and said hello and immediately asked, “are you seeing anyone?” I thought, wow.. how easy was that? Unfortunately, she was shot down with “yes, I am”, but she left with her dignity. Even if the girl you approach gives you a line to brush you off, you won’t ever know it, so this way you can walk away thinking “too bad she’s taken, if only if”.

Dear *Hey You*
My girlfriend of 10 years is deathly afraid of motorcycles and I have wanted one my whole life. I'm finally at a financial place in my life where I could buy one and she is furious. Should I leave my dream behind for my girl's wishes?
Signed,
No wheels

Hey No wheels -
So what’ the problem? Get rid of the old nag and get the bike…

Ok ok.. maybe that’s not the answer you were looking for. Motorcycle ownership is a unique group of it’s own. Once you become an owner, you automatically become a member of a whole other circle/world. The only way to truly understand the true enjoyment of riding, is by witnessing the experience first hand.

My suggestion to you is to help her better understand motorcycles and the lifestyle that comes with it. Take her to the motorcycle show to browse around for fun, go to places where groups of riders hang out, and strike up conversations with them…trust me, they love bragging about their ride and their experiences. You will encounter so many spouses who have had the same fears, and now ride themselves. You might also even consider enrolling in the motorcycle educational/safety class for fun, together. These usually are for 3 - 8hour days.
Ask her to do it to just humor you. Lastly, has she been to the parade to experience our “dykes on bikes”? If that doesn’t do it, I don’t know what will. There are a lot of misconceptions of riding, as mostly you only hear horror stories from a cousin, who’s brother, has a friend who barely got bumped and died. The part they missed was, the rider cut off the driver and was driving irresponsibly. She needs to hear the thrill of riding from the actual riders.

Then if that doesn’t work, well I would have to say then that you have some serious thinking to do … hmm, what’s do you truly want? A brand new shiny bike or an old, used 10 year ride.. (tip: certain classic bikes can be priceless).

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